Personalities



"It's always better when we're together"--Jack Johnson

 I am in love.  Lukas is like his name.  He brings light into our home.  He is Kei, too.  He is our jewel of honor.  He is happiness.  He is bright and social.  He wants to be part of the action and to be with us.  He wants to be involved and wants to smile and bring happiness to us.  I hope that these are qualities that are not just part of being a 4 month-old, but will be qualities of him that will stick. 


Handsome Mr. Dimples

 Our "serious" kid, Kai-kai.  Kai is exploring and testing his world.  What does it mean to be a 3 year-old, to be a big kid?  What do I have control over?  There are so many changes happening in Kai's life right now, from being a big brother, to a new school, to a new school completely in Japanese, to starting potty training.  Kai's favorite word right now is "NO."  He needs to observe something and think about it for awhile before he decides that he's warmed up and ready to jump in.  He is cautious and careful.  The latest thing for him is "organizing."  I've been having a lot of conversations about this about how to deal with my son's "OCD."  How can I parent him and teach him that he needs to compromise and that he can't always have his way, but also respect who he is and love him for him?  I realized that I can put up with my mom's OCD because her way of "organizing" makes sense to me while Kai's way does not.  I'm trying to be patient with him and to teach him and to talk to him.  It is also a process for me, too, to let go of things (although on days he is in school, it does clear my head to clean and organize the house "my way"!)  I had a good talk with the kids' pediatrician about it and she gave me great advice.  She said that God is trying to teach me, too, and to really highlight Kai's strengths.  It is a GOOD thing that Kai is careful.  He is wise to use caution and restraint.  Another quality in him that I hope sticks with him throughout his life is his independence.  He is not easily persuaded and has his own mind, his own style, his own way.  I pray that he will hold onto good ideas like faith and love and be stubborn about those things, no matter what anyone says!  Ryuta's perspective, too, which was helpful is that Kai can be an artist and move to his own music.  I like that.  It reminds me of psalm 139.  God created each one of us special and unique.
For you created my inmost being;


you knit me together in my mother’s womb.

14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;

your works are wonderful,

I know that full well.

On another note, here is a funny recent conversation with Kai at the park: Do you like having a brother?
K: Yes.
Do you want a sister?
K: No.
What is a sister?
K: A girl.  Only boys.  Only me and Lukas. K, mommy?
Go tell your daddy, Kai-kai.

Another conversation today with my son:
Do you like cats?
K: No. Just dogs.
What do you think about getting a pet fish?
K: How about a dog?
What kind of dog do you like?
K: Dalmatians.
You might have to wait awhile for that one, but it is good to dream!

October 13th

This past Saturday was our 7 year "legal" anniversary.  We didn't really do anything at all to celebrate because I was helping out for my old college roommate's baby "non-shower" in SF.  Ryuta took Kai to hang out in Japantown.

Cindra's "non-shower"

My old roomie, Cindy, said she didn't want any gifts or to make any feel like they "had" to buy her any gifts.  Her cousin, Evelyn, and sister, Michelle and I did not feel it was right at all for her not to have a party (at least!) to celebrate the upcoming birth of her first baby.  So, Evelyn & Michelle hooked up the food and I hooked up the decorations and I think Cindy was glad that we forced, I mean encouraged, her to seriously reconsider a celebration!

I originally thought to make nutella cookies.  Fortunately, I wisely decided to do a test run a few days prior.  Thank goodness because they were a disaster!! I made these amazingly delicious mini-brownie cupcakes with strawberry frosting and rasberries.. oh. wow. my waters still just thinking about them.

a wonderful spread from "The Grove"

me & Cin with the view from her roof

7 years and counting...

Every time we have another anniversary (we have two anniversaries, the legal one and the wedding one) I am always amazed that I have been in a relationship as long as this! Wow! 5 years.. Wow...6 years.. WOW. 7 years. SEVEN.  Amazing.  Someone has been willling to try me out for that long.  Someone has been willing to love me and stick it out THAT long.  There is someone in this world that I've also been willing to put myself out there for.  My hope is that our love won't just stand the test of time, but that at the end of this journey, we can look back at our lives, at our children, at our home, at each other, and feel so blessed.  That we can look at one another and KNOW that our connection made a difference.  Every year I am more and more amazed.  It does get harder and harder and takes more and more effort.  At church they were making an announcement for an upcoming marriage retreat and a couple said that the longer you are married, the harder it gets.  Wow.  Why is that?  I guess in some ways it gets better, but it takes work to stay connected.  It takes work to make the other person feel loved, understood, cared for, special.  We were SO exhausted and wiped out after the city.  Ryuta picked up some take-out food and then we just went to bed.  Nothing special at all.  He brought home some roses last night and I made him some anniversary "coupons" to give to him today.  My friend Nadia told me that it isn't too late! 
For those of you who know Ryuta, do you think he'll like this...???

Happy 7 years, my sweets!

西山と学園

今週、海君は日本語学校始まります。私達、ちょっとわくわくしたり、excited and nervousでした。This week, Kai started Japanese preschool at Nishiyamato Gakuen in San Jose.  Monday was his first day.  We were all very nervous, but also excited, too.  This is all a new experience for me, too, taking my son to a VERY Japanese school.  I am familiar with some of the customs, but it doesn't feel natural to me at all.  For example, the children need to bring "indoor shoes" with a special shoe bag, a bento box with a little scarf, a hand towel, a change of clothes for PE and naptime plus a "uniform," and a toothbrush set. 
At first, my attitude has been skeptical of different things and a little resistant.  Why are they charging us for clothes? Why don't they have a building? Why do we have to pay these different entrance and interview and application fees?  Why do I need to pick up AND drop off on Mondays?  Do they have enough teachers? Will they tell me everything? Will Kai like it? Will he make friends?  Will he understand?
But, little by little, my mind and attitude is slowly changing.  I can see that the Japanese way is always above-and-beyond and they are very gentle and nurturing with small children.  I am grateful that we CAN send Kai and that he gets this amazing opportunity at such a young age.  I am more sure that God will develop this gift of bilingualism in our children for a special reason!
Proverbs 18:16
A gift opens the way for the giver and ushers him into the presence of the great.



Kai is in the panda class with Naoko-sensei.



first drop-off..Chie-sensei was comforting him.  Luckily, he didn't cry long.



:(



end of day 1

 While Kai was in school, Lukas and I met up with my cousin, Nicole, at Starbucks at Santana Row. It ends up that she lives very close to there, so we might meet up next week, too! I am seeing that Mondays may be a good day to connect with friends in the south bay or to even meet my dad for lunch.
After meeting with Nicole, it was lunchtime and I wasn't sure if I should drive home with my poor, sick Lukas.  We ended up picking up fast food and I dropped by the school to see how Kai was.  They said that he was very happy and ate a lot at lunch.  Then, Lukas and I went down the street to the book store to hang out.
Naoko-sensei, at pick-up, said that Kai spoke in both English and Japanese.  He sat on the potty and took a very short nap.  I asked Kai after what he thought.  He misses Miss Jynette and Miss Monique.  I told him we could visit to say hi, but this would  be his new school now.  It would take some time, but we think he will like it.  We will see how the rest of the week goes! がんばってね、海君！！